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May 20.2025
3 Minutes Read

Stop Living to Please: Embrace Your True Self on the Road

Vibrant woman embracing the sun, stop living to please concept.

Discovering Your True Self While Traveling

Many of us, especially those living a life on the move like digital nomads, can resonate deeply with the feeling of needing to please others. The pressures of meeting expectations—whether from family, colleagues, or social media—can weigh heavily on our mental health during our travels. Traveling often amplifies these feelings, leading to a struggle of balancing self-care while catering to the needs of our surroundings.

The Burden of The Good Girl/Good Boy Wound

As highlighted by Dr. Rima Bonario, the challenge of conforming to societal expectations—what she refers to as the Good Girl / Good Boy Wound—can leave us feeling empty. This invisible burden isn’t just a personal issue; it's a cultural one that transcends borders. While we may be exploring new countries, the inner dialogue about our self-worth often remains unchanged, tethering us to a cycle of guilt when prioritizing our own needs.

Travel and the Pressure to Perform

The constant need to prove ourselves, particularly as online personas, can be exhausting. Many digital nomads are driven by the desire to share their adventures from picturesque landscapes, making it feel necessary to highlight our experiences authentically. Yet, behind the idyllic photos lies the truth that not every moment is blissful. The incessant striving to be 'enough' can lead to burnout and depressive thoughts, particularly when we compare our experiences to those of others.

Breaking Free from Superwoman/Superman Syndrome

Dr. Bonario’s personal narrative of living like a Superwoman is a common story among many travelers. The realization that our value doesn’t stem from how much we can overextend ourselves is liberating. Embracing our true selves means confronting the fears about potential lost connections, especially in transient communities. What if we took a step back and focused on what feels genuine to us, rather than what we think is expected?

Fostering Sovereign Power Through Self-Care

Reclaiming our sovereignty, as Dr. Bonario explains, isn’t about rejecting kindness or care but rather about filling ourselves first. This self-care ethos resonates deeply with the modern nomad. Our travels should be about exploring and expanding our personal boundaries, not just physically but emotionally too. Finding time for reflection, journaling, or even meditative practices while traveling to replenish our spirits can be beneficial for our mental well-being.

The Importance of Setting Boundaries

Setting boundaries is an act of self-respect. Many digital nomads might feel guilty asserting their right to prioritize personal health; however, it is essential to understand that boundaries lead to healthier relationships with ourselves and others. Whether it's declining an invitation to a sightseeing adventure when you need time alone to recharge, or simply taking a breather from the social media spotlight, these choices are crucial for maintaining mental health while exploring the world.

Empowerment Through Community

By fostering a community that recognizes and supports balanced interactions, we empower ourselves and each other to be authentic. Sharing experiences of feeling overwhelmed while traveling can forge deeper connections, transforming fleeting encounters into profound relationships. When we communicate our struggles, we become part of a collective narrative that validates our journey.

Ultimately, as digital nomads, embracing our truths, setting boundaries, and prioritizing self-care allows us to navigate our travels more mindfully. In shedding the Good Girl / Good Boy Wound, we can discover our truest selves, weaving our individuality into the rich tapestry of cultures we encounter on our adventures.

Final Thoughts

So as you continue your journey, remember that being true to yourself is not just a goal but a powerful tool for growth and fulfillment. Travel is not only about the places we visit but also about the relationships we cultivate and the integrity we maintain. Next time you feel the burden of expectation, pause and reconnect with your desires, your truth, and know that it is perfectly okay to prioritize yourself on this beautiful journey.

Wellness

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